Why I Don’t Like Women by Kitty Bradshaw

Why I Don’t Like Women by Kitty Bradshaw

I do not like women!  This is something I have come to acknowledge as a character flaw within myself.  I talked about this subject before on the site… *shrugs* I am revisiting it since it is something I am dealing with as a human.  This past weekend I roomed with my friend Raijean of Swa-Rai.com, and she found plenty of opportunity to tease me on the subject of our first meeting.  Apparently, when I met Raijean I was very standoffish towards her.  I didn’t really engage in conversation with her, or attempt to make a connection.  In all honesty, I do not remember our first encounter, but I can say that it was nothing personal towards her or anyone else.  I am at times closed off to people… specifically new people!

If I’m in a networking type of environment, I will wedge open the door only so far to initially meet people.  If I am in a business setting I keep it professional.  Outside of those type of environments, I am very suspicious of women.  Although, both Raijean and I joke about our first meeting… I always make sure to apologize to her.  It has been exactly a year since her and I met, and we are good friends. Raijean’s time in my life is meant for me to learn from her. After this weekend we  forced each other to face some issues within ourselves.  She is currently writing a book about her life, and I am writing an essay.  This weekend I talked about how I had been hurt very early on by multiple women who were supposed to protect me.  I recently talked about on Twitter and FaceBook how I decided to write down all the issues I had specifically with my mother and it filled up 4 pages front and back.  It was such a painful process to do that; I cried while writing the issues down.  The women who were supposed to protect me were abusive, and mean.  I had a front row seat to how women could be at their worst, and as I grew older I didn’t want to experience that so I shut the door on being initially warm towards women.

I am not mean to other women, but at the same time I am not in any rush to embrace them.  I don’t make it a point to remember their names.  I guess it’s a case of I don’t like you until you prove to be likeable and If the noodle sticks to the wall… ALDENTE! 🙂

Now with that being said I have tons of female friends…. which is very strange to me, loll. It is strange that someone who doesn’t like women has tons of female friends.  They all have strong personalities, and most of them are dealing with some sort of hurt.  We identify with each other, and respect each others space.  Additionally, none of us judge each other because we each have our own personal demons to battle.  I guess you could refer to us as the “Wounded Birds Club”, lolll.  These women have taught me so much.  Earlier this year I had a break down and I was crying for days on end.  I didn’t expect any of the women around me to be there for me especially because of my one foot in the door, one foot out the door treatment towards them.  The females around me are far better women than me.  They made it a point to call and check on me, calm me down, listen to me cry at times, and/or pray for me.  I am thankful to these women, and at the same time so very undeserving of their kindness towards me.  I am also thankful to my aunt who came into our family and showed me a better way by helping me work through my issues.

Honestly, I most likely will never fully embrace women and I am ok with that.  My biggest issue with my mother is that she is a liar and sneaky.  I don’t have many people who I can say I don’t like…. but best believe the few people who I muster up enough emotion to say, “I do not like _______”, it’s because they are either a liar, sneaky, or any of the other points I wrote down on those four pages of mommy issues.  I do not want to be around anyone who reminds me of my mother… mostly women. I do not want to be hurt by another woman.  I do not like women.