This past weekend I turned down 3 date offers because I was down in the dumps about getting my walking papers…
I decided to take one offer because on Sunday I felt like I needed to get out the house. This particular dude I met at the club *sigh* “The Shadow Night Club“ *holds head down in shame* and to his credit he was cute in the club. Now the thing about meeting people in the club is you gotta worry about them being cute under the natural sunlight, loll. Well he passed that test too…
SO dude says he wants to take me out to dinner and he picks the restaurant.
QUESTION: Why he take me to a fast food restaurant?! *faints*
Now I am not saying I am too good for a fast food restaurant but it just fucked me up a little that in my few years of dating I have never had a dude take me to a fast food restaurant. It wasn’t even a good one like McDonald’s or Grey’s Papaya (yum yum) it was this spot called COSI with the nastiest ass food ever!!!!
Think Quiznos with pizza…
So anyways as I was sitting there waiting for my food on a cafeteria tray to come out as I looked at him from across the table I noticed this long nose hair growing out of his right nostril. It was so long that it grew out and then curled back into his nose… the next stage for this nose hair was to form into a dread. I sat there (as he talked) and starred at it the whole time wondering to myself “Does he not notice this long nose hair?!”
*thinking* they should writie an autographical tale about this called “A Nose Hair Grows In Brooklyn”…
*thinkin* Are nose Hair the latest fashion?!
Meanwhile dude over to there talking about whatever makes him tick and I am over here on my side of the table
*thinkin* I wonder what Mrsfab, Saucy Dame Dizzle, Phone Girl, or Wes would have to say about this?!
*thinkin* why am I thinking about these chicks on my date?!
*thinking* I wish this dude was Terrell Owens… cause Terrell would definately not walk out the house with hair extensions growning out his nose.
*sigh* If Terrell was here we would be gazing into each others eyes blowing kisses at each other…
I mean should I be more disturbed that he took me to a fast food restaurant or that he had a mullet tail growing out of his nose?
In any event I offered to pay for the meal because trust me it was under $10. He declined like the big man on campus and pulled out his credit card like he was moving mountains.
Kitty says: Yes, impress me big daddy! Interest charges are mad sexy! Ok, maybe I sound stuck up… So in order to make amends for me sounding stuck up the next guy I meet I am going to ask him out to dinner first as soon as I get a job, lolll! Men need to be treated too ya know! Maybe I should offer to buy a man a drink… *sigh* but I am scarred of rejection, lolll… plus Terrell wouldnt like me doing that (he gets jealous when I talk about other men on my site)
The month of August should be “Cater To The Men Month” because there are some good men out there who don’t have raccoon tails growing out their nose and they should be honored!
Ladies: Jump on this dammit! Wintertime is fast approaching and I don’t wanna hear no shit about how yall can’t find any good men and it’s cold outside!
I would like to dedicate this song to all the men… cause Kitty loves you (as long as you don’t have donkey pussy growing out your nose..) *kisses*
Torie Michelle says:
Ya’know, I thought I’d be okay. I started off just giggling while reading this entry until I got to “donkey pussy” and then my eyes began to water…lol So over the top funny.
Thank you for that!
July 31st, 2008 at 6:06 am
Bahama says:
WOW..lmao tears are streaming, i’m so sorry who woulda thought dating would be so hard? lol
July 31st, 2008 at 12:49 pm
Wes says:
LMAO!!! Girrrrl you are toooo funny… lol… First of all, Cosi is a GREAT lunchtime spot (they have good tuna melts) but thats about ALL they’re good for. This is NOT a date spot- dude was sadly mistaken (I can’t believe he took you to Cosi, I would’ve been like “what the…?”).
But you know you got to ‘kiss’ (and I use that term loosely) a few frogs b/4 you find your prince. Believe it or not, I found mine on myspace, and we been going strong for almost 2 years now.
July 31st, 2008 at 1:22 pm
Trent says:
This cannot be a true story. It just can’t be.
As a man, I’m offended that this guy would take you out to Cosi on your first dinner date.
Fellas, we have to step our game up.
[to the fellas -->] And then you guys wondered why so many black women are dating white guys.
This is redonkolous.
This can’t be a true story. Is there a punchline to this post?
**shaking my head**
July 31st, 2008 at 2:32 pm
mrsFAB says:
Oh my, Oh my. Where should mrsFAB begin? Well first off, I agree with everyone else that you are toooooo funny! But you know what Kitty, I think you use the phrase stuck up too much. Expecting a little more than fast food on a date is NOT stuck up to me. Hell if it is, then when I was single, I was the Queen of stuckupness! My mom always told me *flash backs now* that, “You can buy your own hamburger!” So if I was out with a guy, just chilling out and about, and we stop for a quick bite, fine. But a real date at night time…PU-LEEZ! No fast food for mrsFAB. And I didin’t pay for meals, either. “Dutch” was not a “treat” for mrsFAB. I was raised with old school values. I am a lady and I will be treated as such. I did not ask for respect, I demanded it and I felt it was deserved. Now if it was a birthday or something, then I would of course pay, but as a general rule, I did not. I may pick up the cocktail tab on occassion.
And the nose hair *cringes*….OMG. I just told my hubbyFAB about that and he really is LOL. I think that would have ruined my appetite. But at least you got out of the house and had a funny story to tell to boot. So you got two treats in one! lol
July 31st, 2008 at 2:35 pm
The Shoenista says:
damn kitty, i like cosi. you cannot possibly liken it a mcdonalds. they have the best bread, salads, and smoothies. now, if it were a lunch date, then i would give him a thumbs up.
a sunday date in the summer…he has many options. make sure your next date picks up a zagats before he makes plans!
now, that nose hair…just f-ing nasty!
July 31st, 2008 at 4:38 pm
DavidDust says:
Honey -
Cosi?!? Oh Lord. I would have gotten my ham and swiss croissant “to go”.
And someone needs to take a Weed Wacker to Mr. Thang’s nose bushes before he goes out of his house again. That is TOO nasty.
But I’m glad you survived with your sanity (mostly) intact.
XOXOXOXOXO
August 1st, 2008 at 2:43 am
SOTBMagazine says:
Wowwwwwwww, that musta sucked a$$. lesson learned…YOU pick the spot but ya can’t really anticipate nose dreads and sh*t now can ya?! and i hate a dude that rambles on about himself on a 1st date. the dating scene is muy whackadocious….i’m there w/ya
August 1st, 2008 at 7:11 pm
PYT in the Chi says:
Miss Kitty please do not put Cosi on the same ring as McD’s. It is definitly more on a Chiptole level; plus I love Cosi! However, I am wondering if this was dinner. For dinner oh hell no. If it was just a lunch date than its not that terrible, similar to meeting someone for coffee. ~ The thought though of that nose hair really bothers me though. Lose his number.
August 1st, 2008 at 8:44 pm
Kitty says:
@ all the COSI lovers.
Fast food is fast food is fast food. If they serve you on trays and you eat with plastic-ware it’s fast food and not suitable for a “first date”. I can see on a 2nd date but not the first regardless if its breakfast, lunch or dinner.
August 2nd, 2008 at 4:02 pm
mrsFAB says:
“Fast food is fast food is fast food.” Gotta love it! lol
August 2nd, 2008 at 5:57 pm
The Man says:
Uhhh, you’re not all that. You should be happy someone wanted to feed your ass. That’s why Black men are going to White/Latina/foreign Black women because American Black women are waaaaay too material and overvalue themselves waaaaay too much. And then steady giving the pussy away to weak brothers.
August 2nd, 2008 at 9:06 pm
Sister Toldja says:
I think Cosi is a semi-tacky choice (though I love the food), but some Cosis have full bars and smores that you can make at the table….was this one of those?
Dude may have been on a budget or maybe he is one of those men who is cautious about spending a lot of money on a first date. I don’t mind cheap dates, so long as the man is creative and doesn’t pick Subway or Starbucks, lol. I wouldn’t have been mad over Cosi, but I wouldn’t have been impressed.
That nose hair woulda killed my appitite anyway!
August 4th, 2008 at 2:30 pm