New York Living: Proper Party Behavior & Etiquette

Party Etiquette

This is a vintage post that I decided to republish as a refresher.  With the holidays upon us, I find that more and more people lack proper etiquette in social settings and end up embarrassing themselves in front of friends, family, and/ or co-workers.  The below are just the basics.

 

FOR GUEST:

1. Never show up empty-handed (bring a card, bottle of wine, a dildo, etc…)

2. Always respond to an invitation no later than 1 week prior to the event with a yes or no.

2a. If this is a major event such as an Anniversary, Birthday, Graduation, Wedding, etc… If you are unable to attend send a card and/or gift with regrets. Again, at the very least send a card!

2b. If for some reason you can’t show up to an event at the last-minute after you have already confirmed your attendance… YOU MUST reach out to the host/hostess immediately with your apologies via PHONE! Keep in mind that people plan parties around the number of guest that say they are going to attend.   Do not dodge the host/hostess out of embarrassment, it comes across as you being a coward!

3. Never try to out do the host… you’re there to support them, not make them look bad.

4. Never talk about the host negatively at their own party… you never know who is listening, and it’s just plain bad manners.

5. Showing up on time is what is expected of you.  I, find that a lot of people are not clever enough to pull off showing up “fashionably late” .

5a. If you don’t have enough funds to bring something to the party… you can redeem yourself by showing up early to help set up or staying late to  help clean up.

6. Never be the only one at the party drunk… except if its your birthday!

7.  Unless you are a stripper and/or a whore, when attending functions at someone’s private residence keep your private areas covered.

8. Always thank the host before leaving their home.

9. Never eat and run… wait at least an hour after eating before leaving.

10.  It is never OK to come out the house frumpy.  Please do your best to be your best..especially at a party!

11. Children at adult parties where drinking is involved is tacky… unless there is a special room reserved for them, away, out of ear shot.

FOR HOST:

1. Always send thank you cards after the event; if it wasn’t a major event then an email will suffice.

2. Clean your damn house before people come over.

3. Never pressure your guest to attend an event.  Two times are the maximum amount of times you should reach out to an individual guest.  If they don’t have enough class to respond… you should re-evaluate why you thought enough of them enough to invite them in the first place.

4. Hot dogs at an adult party are never acceptable.

5. Host:  this goes for your children as well! Children at an adult party where drinking is involved is tacky… unless there is a special room reserved for them, away, out of ear shot.

6. My rule of thumb for throwing parties is if I am having an event where I know my guest will be bringing gifts (i.e. my birthday, wedding, graduation, etc…) I tend to spend more on the food.  Now if it is just your regular ol impromptu get-together… I will focus less on (not ignore) food, and more on good drinks.

7.  I have certain people who only contact me when they want me to attend one of their events… and I absolutely hate that!  So as a rule to host who do this… please know that this is very unclassy behavior.  ESPECIALLY if you do it for major gift giving events!  Learn that your friends are worth more than a gift!

8.  You are who you hang out with… your guest are a reflection of you!  It is OK to have separate circles of friends and have separate events for those individual groups.  Keep your whores, co-workers, and mafia types separate.

9.  Strippers at a baby shower are ok in my book!  Who wants to sit around and look at a fat women all damn day… the ladies of the flower guild need some entertainment!

10.  I think it is refreshing when a host offers a non-alcoholic alternative at a party where liquor is served other than sodas and kool-aid.  Someone say Virgin-Rum Punch?!?  lolll  (*whispering* substitute rum for ginger beer *winks* loll)