Gossip Girl Review: The Undergraduates

This week on Gossip Girl, Blair and Serena start their first day at Columbia University by casually walking into the ultra exclusive rich kids campus club called the “Hamilton House” to see if they were invited in.  Both walked through the door without any doubt in their minds that they would be invited in. However, much to everyone’s surprise, Blair was admitted and Serena wasn’t.

Now before I go on, I must pause to discuss a “Moment in Fashion”.  The girls and I were on Twitter last night raving about the dress Serena wore during the opening scenes.  She had the most fantastic dress I have laid my eyes upon in the last 2 fashion seasons.  That dress gave me life… and all the twitter fashionistas were a buzz.  If you don’t watch this episode for anything, please just watch the first 10 minutes to see this dress.  Serena has cemented herself as the new Queen Bee of TV Fashion, taking over for Wilhelmina from the now defunct Ugly Betty.

Favorite Twitter Quote:

@noiresocialista isn’t it though + the nude over sized belt is perfection
@lukearosa Serena, I have to hand it to you. That dress is above and beyond bananas #gossipgirl
@SweetBrandi Yaaass she gives me life
@Dawnavette She has the best style…did u check Blair’s animal print sheath though?!? *swoon*

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Blair get’s acquainted with her new social set…

note: this episode marks the return of old high school flunky Penelope (Amanda Setton) whose aunt was a founding member of the Hamilton House.

Penelope was under the impression that she would finally get to sit at the top of the symbolic social steps, but Blair quickly kicked Penelope back in her place; then further pissed on her hopes by uttering choice insults every chance she got throughout the episode.

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Then there was Nate (Chace Crawford), the father of my children in my dreams.  Nate, Nate, Nate…. Nate could be in the room with 100 women, 99 good, and 1 dysfunctional/ deranged chick… of course he picks the crazy one with daddy issues every time.  Remember the girl from the rival family last season?!  Remember Jenny, Remember Vanessa?!  No seriously all of Nate’s romantic interest have daddy issues.  Welp, at least he is good to look at.

So here we go again… *inserts Juliette here* (Katie Cassidy).  Did anyone else wonder how Juliette got into the “exclusive” Hamilton House, when her character was portrayed as broke in the first two episodes of this season?!  Like, wasn’t she putting the tags back on her clothes, then trying to return them to the store?  Anyways, Juliette is apparently obsessed with Serena and wants to ruin her life, so she attempted to cause a rift between Serena and Blair… clearly she hasn’t done her homework.  I would be nervous if Serena and Blair ever stopped having a rift between them.

Dear Juliette: Please get an original plan next time.  *yawns* Someone please kill her off already, or worse, banish her to Seattle with Little J.

Favorite Twitter Quote:

@andilavs Is it just me or are Nate’s eyebrows approaching Sandy Cohen territory?

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Next, Chuck… and his new Jennifer Aniston bka Eva played by Clemence Poesy. …… *smh* once Blair refuses to shake your hand in public during the light of day as if you were some prostitute trying to seek redemption… that pretty much seals your fate on the show.  Then, to make matter worse… Blair goes on to utter the most catty insult ever heard in the history of television:

Chuck will soon realize that it doesn’t matter if the dress is couture if the girl is off the rack. And then, as with all things that don’t fit, you’ll be sent back to where you came from.

Dear Eva: Please clear out your locker, and pick up your dignity along with your final paycheck in HR.

Favorite Twitter Quote:

@lovenicolexo Eva is disgusting. Like I know that’s been established already but it’s too a point where I’m afraid that Chuck is now blind. #GossipGirl

@candycoatedbags She (Eva)  just needs a makeover and a shopping spree. Then she’ll fit right in lol.

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(The) Vanessa… *sighs* everytime she appears on-screen I secretly pray that the show goes to commercial.  As soon as she appeared on camera, all the bars of soap in my house cried.

Dear CW-11: Ok, we get it, her character is from Brooklyn.  However, there are many fashionable people who take baths that reside in Brooklyn.  Please see Williamsburg for reference.

Favorite Twitter Quote:

@Dawnavette WHY does Vanessa always look like she needs a flat-iron  & a shower?!? Grosss.

@dnky Omg  Someone call the police. Vanessa has raided the 99 cent store and all the accessories  are gone.

In addition, I think Georgina has crossed paths with The Vanessa one too many times… her fashion (non)sense is starting to rub off on the new mother.  Then again, has Georgina ever worn anything that we have loved?!  hmmmm

Favorite Twitter Quote:

@dkny Georgina must have gotten into a fight with the costume dept at #GG. It’s the only logical solution.

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Speaking of dull plot lines… in last night’s episode we found out what we already knew… Dan is not the father.  Like, even the envelope that Georgina sent the paternity test samples in knew that Dan wasn’t the father.  Lily, being a retired hoe herself, was the only one who believed the wicked wonder Georgina.

In the end, Blair and Serena bond even further in their friendship over the ashes of Juliette’s future existence on the show.  With the help of Lily, Serena finally gets accepted into the halfway house, ooppsie I mean the Hamilton House, lollll.  Chuck and Eva suck face in the Bass burning bed.  Chace and the weakest link, Juliette establish their soon-to-be defunct relationship.  Finally, Dan decides that even though he is not the father, he wants to fight to keep Milo… while working it out with the film that coats the bottom of the shower curtains, The Vanessa.

Click on image to purchase the Diamond Crown Key Pendant seen in last night’s episode of Gossip Girl on the Hamilton House members.

Photo Credit: Giovanni Rufino / The CW © 2010 The CW Network, LLC. All Rights Reserved.

<blockquote>Photo Credit: Giovanni Rufino / The CW © 2010 The CW Network, LLC. All Rights Reserved.</blockquote>

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